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“There’s no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.” – Will Rogers
I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.- Will Rogers
« I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody chance to get sore at everybody else. Sometimes it takes two or three conferences to scare up a war, but generally one will do it. » – Will Rogers
“I have a scheme for stopping war. It’s this — no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.” – Will Rogers
We have plenty of confidence in this country, but we are a little short of good men to place our confidence in. ~Will Rogers
Always drink upstream from the herd.- Will Rogers
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. -Will Rogers
There ought to be one day – just one – when there is open season on senators. ~Will Rogers
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these acceptance speeches there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven. ~Will Rogers
The best thing about this group of candidates is that only one of them can win. ~Will Rogers